Tuesday, April 1, 2014

Converstation with My Partner #2

Conversations
It has been a while.
It has been a while sense I have posted and it has been a while sense Ali and I had a chance to meet last. From busy schedules, spring break to being out of town we have had hard time getting to together. Every week we talk about it, maybe Monday or Wednesday. It seemed like nothing was working well. We would snapchat on occasion. Yes we have each others snapchat! A really easy way to see what someone is doing right at that moment is a five second photo. Yet snapchat doesn't give you any information on how they are feeling. I knew the rough facts about Ali's life from snapchat but not details about them.
When we meet up the other day I got to hear more than a text or a snapchat photo would let me know! Ali has been having a pretty exciting semester or at least last few weeks so far!  He has his own apartment and he just go this own furniture! It has arrived! You could say he was excited about this. A smile never left Ali's face.  I got excited just for him. I was reminded that living in a dorm is so easy; I have a bed, desk, and such. While living off campus or even in some on-campus housing there is no ready-to-go furniture. How difficult would it be to get here and move into an apartment? You need furniture, toiletries, kitchen supplies, food and more! I am very privileged to have lived on campus for two years without having to worry about this much. Next year I have to worry about it but again I have a family who will be here to help me buy the right bed or the right desk and move me in. I think it is hard on Ali to do this without his father and mother. He does have a cousin here who is very helpful. I know Ali appreciates him a lot.
That brought me to another thought. A lot of college students come to TCU knowing a handful of people. I have a friend who has fourteen high school classmates come with her. I had another who had four. Having a few people you already know at TCU can make the campus a lot more friendly and a lot less lonely. I am not saying everyone hangs out with their high school classmates but it does give a friendly face around campus, a familiar one. Ali came to campus knowing his cousin. That is a good start but he still didn't have the multitude of faces that a lot of students come to TCU with. He did not have as much as a "safety net" to say as the average TCU student.
He had a big day on Monday. He passed his driver’s test! I didn't even know he was going for it. This is huge! He doesn't have a car but his cousin does. (Another way having connections on campus is helpful) Having  a car means he can go more places. He can see more parts of Fort Worth. I take it for granted that my friends have cars. While a lot of Ali's friends are internationals as well so cars are few and far between.
Well that's all folks. I hope you could see that I learned a lot more about privilege during our conversations. I have to say I am more thankful for everything I have been given and how easy the transfer from high school to college was for me.
 

2 comments:

  1. Darby, your post opened my eyes a lot! I agree that we often take for granted how many people we usually know when coming to TCU. It really is nice to come in knowing a few people particularly at the beginning of freshman year. I cannot imagine what these international student go through when coming to college. Not only do they not know anyone, but they also have a language barrier, which makes getting to know people even more difficult.
    That is so fun and exciting that he passed his driving test! Tell him congratulations for me! I remember taking my driving test, and I was so nervous, but it was such a cool experience. I am sure that his friends will be so excited about that as well. Even though he doesn't have a car here, it will be nice that his cousin does. He will have a great time getting to see the Fort Worth community, and I am sure he will have a lot of fun adventures to tell you about! Thank you for the effort you put into this post. I really enjoyed reading it!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Thanks for posting about your conversation with Ali, and for you empathy.

    ReplyDelete